my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
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