Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
