opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize