i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
