My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
