I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
