Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
