hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
