She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
