Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
