He is such a slut. More and more my type.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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