yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Randomize
