i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Randomize
