i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
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