I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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