just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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