You don't have asthma, your pregnant
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
