no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
