Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.

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(231): View more from Michigan

the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants

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(501): View more from Arkansas

There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.

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(302): View more from Delaware

I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay

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(801): View more from Utah

If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.

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(760): View more from California

Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.

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(281): View more from Texas

I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!

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