We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
i out mim tonsoeep
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