I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
