i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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