1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
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