Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
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