i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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