you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Randomize
