Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
