Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Randomize
