She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
