every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
