I'm jealous of your bromance
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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