On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize
