i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
