My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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