My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
