I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I just sucked dick on a ferry
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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