I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
