wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize