stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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