I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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