Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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