Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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