i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
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