We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
