She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
