Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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