Your face is a jimmy john
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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