i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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