the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
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