After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize