I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
